Lisbon Hash House Harriers | LH3 » 2012 » January

Hash Report #707 – 21 January 2012

K2 — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 09:31:49 +0000

Hash #707 was hared by Maple Stroker, Hoochy Coochy Man, and Fast Finish. Starting point for the Hash was at the Mula Dam. Wimps route was estimated at 7km, with Rambo route estimated at 11km. Weather was fantastic, as it has been for the last month or so. There were numerous Hash Views, including a fantastic one with ~360-degree views. 102 Hashers participated, marking a record for LH3. This did include a large number (51) of visitors – Marines and Sailors stopping in Lisbon with the USS Bataan.

Virgins on this Hash were numerous, to include many of the Marines and Sailors, Ammi Person, Bo Beijer-Olsen, Emma Nilsson, Eleanor Horton, and Kate Dennis.

Retornados were numerous: Sven Tollin, Just Coming, No Moor, Captain America, Nearly There, Elaine Gerstenmeyer, Easy Goa, Never Ready, Luca Gerstenmeyer, Flying Mum, Nitrous Oxide, Ulli Meyer, Dieuwke Schweitzer, Willem Trotske, and Hannes Trotske.

Hashy Birthdays were celebrated for Dangle Berry (30); Easy Loser (25; must be an error, as she just celebrated 20 last Hash); F2RB (22); Hoochy Coochy Man (70); Nearly There (25); Nitrous Oxide (10); Wanna Bet (252).

There were several No Names:

Ian Gerstenmayer (son of Pencil Squeezer) – not Swedish and plays no musical instruments; likes football and swimming.

Erika Vlug – I didn’t write anything down – apologies.

Yara Buschle (daughter of Capacabuba) – I didn’t write anything down – apologies.

Namings:

Limor Schweitzer – has embarrassing knees, is always drunk, works on robots, is Israeli, denies having worked for Mossad. Admits to having translated for a film starring Cicciolina. Our minds starting to freeze up after much inactivity, we considered several names, including Inspector Gadget, before settling on Robogasm.

Reminder – if you don’t like your Hash name, please advise Hash Master (me); you can apply to have your name changed after a minimum of six months with your current name. There are penalties involved.

Misdemeanors were adjudicated against the following:

I didn’t write any of them down, as I was shocked and dismayed to find myself in the Circle, for allegedly having short-cutted. Or short the cut. Or cut the short. What is the past tense of ‘short cut’?

- I do remember, however, that F2RB spent some time in the circle for having abused alcohol

Upcoming Hares:

4 & 5 February – Away Hash – K2, TWH, Monica Piercy, Ba Ba Boom!, Easy Loser – more wanted

18 February – I don’t remember

707 Hash Costume Contest – Many apologies for the mismanagement of this event. Perhaps I can plead being tired and worn out, or losing my memory, or I don’t know what else. Anyhow, winners of the contest for the Wimps: Pencil Squeezer; Rambos: Easy Loser.

Away Hash – we are now up to about 25 rooms. There is no coach. All Hashers are individually responsible to the hotel for all debts incurred; I will not collect any cash. Reminder – 50 euro per room per night, half board. Sign up ASAP.

Hash Mugs – have still arrived. If you attended the On On Dinner, the mugs are free. If you did not attend the dinner, mugs are one euro each. Hashers will then need to bring their own mugs to the hash – cups will only be provided for virgins! All Hashers will be heavily encouraged to buy their own mugs and bring them to each Hash. If you have a Hash Handle, and are called into the Circle, and are found to be without your mug, things will get messy.

We have received our new Hash water bottles and Hash T-shirts. T-shirts are 6 euro each; bottles are 5 euro each; purchase one of each for 10 euro.

Hashers are encouraged to bring and reuse their own plastic bottles – can be refilled from larger bottles of water provided by Beer Meisters.

Upcoming fancy dress/costume events: if you’ve read this far and are interested, please contact me via email, Facebook, or in person with your suggestions. Possibilities: Carnival; St. Patrick’s Day; Elvis’ birthday; the Muppets; many more. In your suggestion, please indicate on which Hash we should organize your fancy dress event.

Hash Master and Scribe

Hash Report #706 – 7 January 2012

K2 — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 11:12:03 +0000

Hash #706 was hared by Ba Ba Boom! and K2. Starting point for the Hash was in the southern portion of Parque Monsanto. Both Rambos and Wimps were primarily on trails within the park for the entire Hash; Rambos did a long loop down past the closed water park and São Francisco Xavier hospital (veteran Hashers will remember this as part of the Tasmanian Devil farewell Cinco de Maio Hash, when Little Jumper broke his arm). Wimps route was estimated at 7km, with Rambo route estimated at 11km. Weather was fantastic, with many thanks due to RA Depth Charge. 60 Hashers participated, with approximately 20-25 of them being Rambos – perhaps a high number for Rambo participation in recent memory. There were several nice Hash Views, including but not limited to, when your faithful Hare changed shirts before the Hash J.

Virgins on this Hash were numerous, to include Ginny Stockdale’s children, Alessandra, Christophe, and Joran, Ana Marques (not related to Ginny Stockdale), Dan Filieon, Polly and James Carr. Apologies for butchered names.

Retornados were numerous: Helena Wallentin, Diane Thoms, David Thomas, Maria Andrade, Tricia Marques, Erika Vlug, Depth Charge, Eagle Eye, Lord Egg, Mismatch, Julie Kielberg, Anita Lekic (who left prior to the Circle, and is thus due a double down-down at her next Hash), Not In Charge, Party Pants, Shallow Charge, and Stephan, Lea, and Yara Buschle (Familia Capacabuba).

Hashy Birthdays were celebrated for Ba Ba Boom (15); Easy Loser (20); Father Haggis (99); Honky Tonk Woman (70); Ice Pyck (60); La Formiga (15); Maple Stroker (45); Fire Farter (18); Maple Sugar (33); Mile High (20); Oval (310); and This Won’t Hurt (85).

There were several No Names:

Anita Lekic – Left before the Circle. Obviously this will reflect negatively on her when her Name is chosen.

Monica Piercy – British, steals hats, something about ‘down low’, is of Polish descent, and likes to dance.

Leemor Shweicher (I know I’ve destroyed that name; apologies) – has embarrassing knees, is always drunk, works on robots, is Israeli, denies having worked for Mossad.

Namings:

Lea Buschle – is not Swedish or an interpreter; is the 7-year-old daughter of Capacabuba; likes cartoons but has no boyfriends yet. Likes Hello Kitty, so is now named Kittycabuba.

Misdemeanors were adjudicated against the following:

Numerous named Hashers – for not wearing Hash t-shirts
F2RB – for wearing a hat in the Circle
F2RB – for hands in pockets in the Circle
Several which I’ve missed
Mismatch – for interrupting the RA – was directed to drink with the Sleeve of Shame, but refused to do so. Therefore, Depth Charge stood in for him and suffered his punishment gladly and with grace and aplomb, whatever that is.

Special recognition to Breast Stroker who has by now departed for Brazil, but promises to return after approximately six months.

Upcoming Hares:

21 January – Maple Stroker and Fast Finnish

4 & 5 January – Away Hash – K2, TWH, Monica Piercy, Ba Ba Boom!, Easy Loser – more wanted

21 January – 707 Hash – dress up like an airplane, or an aircrew member, or something related to the venerable 707 aircraft. Prizes awarded to the best Rambo and Wimp costumes. Or maybe just the two best costumes. Also – it looks like we will have a very large number of visitors for this Hash – so please plan to arrive early and pay quickly to facilitate the On On, etc.

Away Hash – we are now up to about 16 rooms. Many are driving; it looks like as of now, only about 13 are going to take the bus/coach. The coach will be available to take us to/from starting point for Saturday’s Hash, so all Hashers riding the bus that day will be charged a minor fee to offset the total hire cost. Those taking the Hash from/to Estoril will bear the majority of the cost. It looks like the coach will be leaving from the Casino about 20.00 Friday evening. Many would prefer to leave earlier, but some can’t leave until 20.00. Those riding the coach should plan to eat before, or bring a sandwich, etc., so as to reduce break time en route. Please sign up now! Please plan to pay at the next Hash – 21 January!

Hash Mugs – If you attended the On On Dinner or New Year’s Recovery Lunch, the mugs are free. Otherwise, mugs are one euro each. Hashers will then need to bring their own mugs to the hash – cups will only be provided for virgins! All Hashers will be heavily encouraged to buy their own mugs and bring them to each Hash. If you have a Hash Handle, and are called into the Circle, and are found to be without your mug, things will get messy.

We have Hash water bottles and Hash T-shirts. T-shirts are 6 euro each; bottles are 5 euro each; purchase one of each for 10 euro.

Hashers are encouraged to bring and reuse their own plastic bottles – can be refilled from larger bottles of water provided by Beer Meisters.

Hash Master and Scribe

Hash Report #705 – 1 January 2012

K2 — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 14:02:41 +0000

Hash #705 was hared by Boomerang and Confuzeus. Starting point for the Hash was in the area between Birre and Areia. After a delayed start caused by the Hares not remembering where the trail started, Rambos and Wimps enjoyed a great Hash with numerous very good views. Rambos ran north into Charneca, before heading back toward the ocean and through the Roman ruins encountered on a recent Hash, not too far from Guincho. While we’ve come to appreciate an interesting array of snacks as provided by our new Beer Meisters (Pencil Squeezer and Capacabuba), they didn’t fail us this time – providing marzipan sweets which are an Austrian tradition for the New Year. Please don’t forget to regularly thank our BMs for their service.

Virgins on this Hash were numerous, to include Ginny Stockdale, the Sullivan family (John, Jane, Emilia, and Euan); Ron and Adrian Brae; and Jane Filmore.

Retornados were Jane Woodcock, Baroness, Baronetta, Pussy Galore, Blue Balls, Finnish Eater, Maple Sugar, Ready Steady Stop, Snoopy, Tatties, and Sofia Duarte.

Hashy Birthdays were celebrated for Bardess (430); Baron von Jockstrap (55); Breast Stroker (20); Crunchy (30); Good Vibrations (10); K2 (66); Maple Stroker (44); F2RB (20); Peanut (45); and Pencil Squeezer (10).

There were two No Names, both children of Loopy:

Michael Halkon – is not Swedish, is not blonde, plays no musical instruments, and likes dinosaurs and Nintendo.

Sofia Halkon – also likes Nintendo, but not sure about dinosaurs or Swedish dinosaurs.

Namings:

Paula Mattos – is not Swedish, is an interpreter, reads books, does photography, and is buying a new red car. Most of the name choices related to her impending car purchase, and we settled on Bombeira.

Sue Nutt – wife of Blue Balls, so we obviously focused on name choices connected to ‘balls’, but nothing decent came to our minds. Eventually, because she has a habit of being slow in most things she does, we decided to call her Zoom.

Misdemeanors were adjudicated against the following:

Boomerang and Confuzeus – forgetting where their trail started
Fast Finnish – for not taking her pills
Ba Ba Boom! – for being hungover
Zoom – for stealing somebody’s telephone, and wearing her clothes inside out
Boomerang – for setting up a market stall at the Circle
Easy Loser and F2RB – for PDA
Crunchy – for having glitter on his face
Beer Meisters – for setting out the beer after everything else

Upcoming Hares:

7 January – Ba Ba Boom! and K2

21 January – Maple Stroker and Fast Finnish

4/5 February (Away Hash) - K2, Monica Piercy, Easy Loser, and This Won’t Hurt

Following the Circle, we all adjourned to the Quinta do Cortador for the On On Lunch, consisting of cabrito or bacalhau. Following a good meal, we all participated in the traditional rendition of Father Abraham, led, as per tradition, by Oval. Then, several Hashers were recognized for their contributions throughout the year:

Capacabuba and Pencil Squeezer – for volunteering to serve as Beer Meisters and already raising the bar on the level of refreshments provided.

Maple Sugar – for having served as previous Hash Cash

Hoochy Coochy Man – for serving as Hare Raiser, and also to recognize his and Honky Tonk Woman’s service at various events such as providing the turkey sandwiches during the Jingle Bells Hash.

Ba Ba Boom! – for serving as Hash Cash

Breast Stroker – for taking flattering photos of your HM while I was running (and not just while I was walking). Hey – I bought the cheap wine, so I could give it out to who I wanted and for whatever reason came into my mind!

Easy Loser and F2RB – for having served as previous Beer Meisters

Boomerang and Confuzeus – for Haring the Recovery Hash

Ba Ba Boom! – for replacing Tasmanian Devil as our new Hash Pimp(ette)

Following this, instigated by Fast Finnish, we all participated in providing entertainment. Table 1 were the unanimous talent show winners and will be expected to repeat their performances at the Away Hash. Many thanks to Fast Finnish for organizing the impromptu entertainment.

As we leave 2011 behind and begin 2012, let me thank everybody who contributes to making LH3 a success.

—–

Hash Mugs – If you attended the 007 Dinner or New Year’s Recovery Lunch, the mugs are free. If you did not attend the dinner or lunch, mugs are one euro each. Hashers will then need to bring their own mugs to the hash – cups will only be provided for virgins! All Hashers will be heavily encouraged to buy their own mugs and bring them to each Hash. If you have a Hash Handle, and are called into the Circle, and are found to be without your mug, your choices will be to either purchase a new mug (one euro each) or drink from your shoe.

We have received our new Hash water bottles and Hash T-shirts. T-shirts are 6 euro each; bottles are 5 euro each; purchase one of each for 10 euro.

Hashers are encouraged to bring and reuse their own plastic bottles – can be refilled from larger bottles of water provided by Beer Meisters.

Standby for more info about the Away Hash – weekend of 4/5 February in the Algarve.

Hash Master and Scribe

Hash Report #704 – 17 December 2011

Bad Hare Day — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 06:29:56 +0000

Hash #704
This was our TRADITIONAL Jingle Bells Hash which meant some form of seasonal dress was worn by all. The Hares were the 3 ladies – Ba Ba Boom, Breast Stroker & Easy Loser, who baptised it as the “Jingle Boobies Hash”. Each of them sported exuberant & fulsome prosthetics to match their theme. They introduced a couple of new activities which were signposted during the hash (JBH ?) and involved some mandatory fondling of those latex extensions. Thanks also to these, the Hares were always visible and any walkers in doubt were quickly shepherded back to the route by BaBaBoom’s whistle.
The meeting-point and circle was very conveniently located in a parking lot beside the Avenida Infante D Henrique, in the western end of Cascais. The weather was beautiful with clear skies and magnificent views out over the sea towards the south. We apparently had a choice of routes, and No Moor soon decided upon his own unique option, which resulted in his solitary return during the circle. The rest split into rambos and Walkers and made their way west past Casa da Guia and out along the coast. The Runners doubled back and managed to cross back over the outward route, with a few crisp instructions from Easy Loser to avoid any confusion (“Yes, Yes,…No, No”). We then headed down along the cliff road towards town, passing the Boca de Inferno and all meeting up a couple of times for a beer stop and some Boobie Carol singing. The Rambos made a loop thru Cascais town before heading back to the start point where the Wimps soon joined them. All in all, a lovely route with great views and enjoyable diversions.
At the Circle we were treated to a magnificent feast, both gastronomic and visual. First course was provided by Hoochie Coochie Man and Honky Tonk Woman, with delicious turkey sandwiches plus a selection of condiments such as Cumberland sauce. Whilst we getting on the outside of that, Pencil Squeezer and Capacabuba were setting – and decorating – a table of magnificent treats. These included Gluehwein (enhanced by Pencil Squeezer’s own Austrian recipe, known only to a handful of ageing ski instructors in the Arlberg); a hot chocolate drink called Lumumba which could be enhanced with Amaretto and/or brandy ; delicious stollen cake ; a selection of seasonal chocolates ; plus the usual etcs. The Hash was unanimous in it’s appreciation to all those whose efforts made this a memorable day. And, as one hasher commented – we’re in danger of becoming the 1st Michelin-star Hash…..
Virgins on this Hash were(with apologies for the spelling) – Marcia Turner, Willem Trotsken and Eliane Gerstenmayer (wife of Pencil Squeezer).
Retornados included Christoph Trotsken, Robert Scott and Dangleberry
Birthdays were celebrated for : Boomerang (255); Confuzeus (66); Johnny English (10); Maple Stroker (44); Pencil Squeezer (10); This Won’t Hurt (85).
There were 2 No Names – Kia Bueschle, aged 7, and originally from Saarbruecken in Germany. And Maria, who didn’t divulge her age but it’s more than 7; Portuguese-Danish, living in London, working at check-in for SAS at Heathrow (must be worth asking for an upgrade), and mother of Immaculate Misconception, which left us all puzzled. Unfortunately, she won’t be back on the LH3 hash till March, which should give us enough time to think up a decent handle.
There were 2 Namings.
Stephanie Matteo – is in the US Army, based at Oeiras; dresses up in St Trinians-style black skirts and stockings to impress; loves her M-16; and, most impressively, gave us 10 push-ups as a stimulus. With this in mind we considered – amongst others – Pistol-Packin’ Mama, GI Jane, and Dirty Dancer, but settled on Lethal Weapon.
Andreas Savvas – is originally from Cyprus, and works in the cruise line industry. Not to be outshone, Andreas rose to the challenge and also did 10 push-ups, with no sign of effort and protestations that he could have done more… We then considered handles such as Onassis, Zorba & Greek Default (reflecting his origins); Cruiser and Bubbles (his work activities); and finally agreed on a made-up concoction – BoobieZookee (blame the mulled wine and Lumumba).
Misdemeanours – as ever, there were many…. Mile High & BaBa Boom for phone abuse; Firestarter & Bad Hare Day for smoking while the rest of the hash was exercising; the 3 Hares for inappropriate exposure of their prosthetics …. However, we forewent the Down-Downs during this Circle in order to have time to thank the Beermeisters, HCM and HTW for their supply of goodies. These misdemeanours have not been either forgiven or forgotten, and will be punished at the next hash.
The next Hash will be the Recovery Hash, on 1 January, to be hared by Boomerang and Confuzeus. This will be followed by the OnOn Lunch, at the Quinta do Cortador in Cascais.
Following that, the Hash will return to it’s normal schedule, with the next one on Saturday 7 January. After that, on Saturday 21 January, there is a theme – to dress up like an airplane or a flight crew member (sexy stewardesses wanted). Or a cup of coffee, tea, or me. Cheap prizes to the contest winners – one each for Rambos and Wimps.
Away Hash – Saturday, 4 February (tentative) – Algarve Hash have indicated an initial interest in Hashing with us; awaiting more feedback.

Father Haggis